HELP! There's a Tree Growing in Me . . .

Seedlings for our garden (2009)

One of the earliest memories I have is the first time my brother and I got to eat watermelon from the rind.  We were sitting outside on my great aunt’s porch with our dad, and he was teaching us how to shoot the seeds out of our mouths.  We were having a wonderful time until I accidentally swallowed one of the seeds.  My dad, always the mischievous jokester, decided it would be funny to pass on some age old ‘wisdom’ that his father had passed down to him.  He frowned at me and sighed, “Well, it looks like you’ll be growing leaves out of your ears and nose soon!”

Immediately, my brother thought that would be cool, but as for me, I can tell you, I was a lot less enthused!  Not wanting to seem like a crybaby in front of my little brother, though, I just laughed.

However, as the days and weeks passed, I constantly checked my nose, ears, and mouth in the mirror to see if I could glimpse anything green starting to poke out of anywhere.  The more time passed, the more I was convinced that one morning I’d wake up with tree limbs poking out of me in every direction.  I even started having awful dreams about it.

Finally, one night before bed, I asked my dad when the watermelon tree was finally going to grow.  At first, he was completely confused because it had been weeks since the seed-swallowing incident, but then it all came flooding back to him.  He laughed a good, hearty laugh, and then explained that I had nothing to worry about since seeds can’t grow in bellies.

For the longest time, I had forgotten this entire event until about 3 years ago.  My kids and I were having a Fourth of July cookout at my dad’s house.  I was try to teach my son (then 3) how to eat watermelon on his own.  He was chomping enthusiastically on his piece of watermelon when suddenly he got this strange look on his face and started to cry!

I rushed over and took him in my arms, asking him what was wrong.  He sobbed, “I swallowed a seed, Mama!  A tree’s gonna come out my ears!!!”  Apparently, while I was outside manning the grill, my father had been up to his same old tricks and had warned his grandson about the ‘dangers’ of seeds.  How dull life would be without parents . . . and grandparents!