Saturday, April 20, 2013

R: Real Friends, Please Stand Up!

Perhaps the hardest part of moving and buying our own home was having to leave our old neighborhood behind. My son and daughter spent 5 years getting to know the children who lived in our neighborhood. It is difficult to leave friendships behind. Almost 6 months later, my children still mourn the end of their friendships, and it makes me sad.

Normally, I would have done everything in my power to keep my kids connected to their friends. However, the months before our move, some of the children started treating my kids poorly, especially my little princess. These children kept making fun of my kids and calling them mean names. On top of this, they would go play with other kids in the neighborhood and then tell my son and daughter that they weren’t invited to play.

I know kids aren’t always nice, and teasing and name calling are a part of life. Still, I have taught my son and daughter that such behavior is unacceptable, and it hurts to see them crying because they think their ‘friends’ don’t like them anymore. My children are very forgiving (as you can see by their desire to still see these children), and I’m proud of this. I am still their mother, though, so it’s my job to make the tough choices and always think of what is best for them.

I want my kids to be forgiving, but I also want them to be smart. If people keep abusing their friendship with you, no matter how many times you tell them it hurts you, it is time to let such friendships go. I want my children to know that it is ok to end a friendship if the other person keeps hurting them. I want them to have the courage to always look out for their best interest. Of course, friendships are precious and should be fought for. But if the other person isn’t doing the same, it isn’t a real friendship, and it’s time to move on.

As warmer weather sets in, my kids are spending more time outside. They are starting to talk to some of the children in our new neighborhood, and I have a feeling they will be making some new friends soon. I hope they find some real friends here so they can finally see what true friendship is and forget the pain of the past. I hope they meet some other kids who are caring and fun to be with--children who are worthy to be called their friends.

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